Ramble I must and ramble I will.

[invertin]

Farms. Farms seem like unassuming lands of peace.

Wrong. Even as people work on farms, they are completely unaware to the neverending war constantly going on around them.

Goats. Goats are evil. Pure evil. Ever wonder why Satan himself has goat legs and goat horns? That's because goats are evil.

The goats are not one of the evil creatures created by Naga the 4th, and ally with no-one. Not even the almost as evil cows.

The original Goats were not a species but a religion, a small cult of sheep that killed black sheep, thkning them to be bringers of darkness and evil. Ironically the black sheep were sheep with magical powers to prevent evil. The rest of the sheep eventually closed off the Goat cult from the rest of the sheep, no goat was to interact with any sheep.

The thing with sheep is that their wool attracts evil energies until it's been removed from the sheep, if it weren't for the evil reducing powers of the black sheep, all sheep would be corrupted.

Of course, this cult had no black sheep. The evil powers corrupted them into the beasts we now see as goats. If the goats are left for too long, the evil energy will turn them into demonic goat-men of doom and destruction. Which is why the sheep found a way to stop them. A black sheep willingly sacrificed himself to create pure anti-evil energy. The sheep then found a brilliant use for it...

The energy was converted into a single seed, the seed grew into a crop. the crop dropped seeds. The sheep had invented corn, and as a result, they had invented pop-corn. The goats are attracted to this crunchy substance like moths to a light, and it remobed a small portion of their evil energy, just enough to stop them from becoming demonic princes.

As long as popcorn, and corn remains the goats will not destroy us. The evil energy reforms itself in the goats, causing a temporary shortage of evil energy every time a goat eats corn or popcorn, which is why goats that don't eat corn of popcorn can't turn demonic either. There just isn't enough evil energy in the world.

That is just a small portion of the war between farm animal and farm animal.

The cows are like a mix between a terrorist cult and the mafia. During the early years of humanity, soon after we'd invented fighting, the cows abused our state and attacked various human towns and cities, disguised as other farm animals. Cows also use mind control devices hidden in their barns, anyone who finds it forgets about it, and anyone they find useful is controlled. Bulls are also an unfortunate victim of this control device, which is why they hate red so much.

Normally I'd carry on but for two things- This post is too long and I forgot what else the cows have done... Oh well.

[MONKEYZ RULE]

Dude, don't do drugs (all that began with D!!)

[Glabbit]

Happy to see you're your old self again, Percy!

[Chainsaw man]

Normally I'd carry on but for two things- This post is too long and I forgot what else the cows have done... Oh well.

I could Show you some of my Collection of Yiffy art to show you what else they have done if you would like
Bunny knows all about that...

[Lotus Wolf]

*COUGH* "LSD." *COUGH* *Cough* *cough*

If you wrote a book, i would SOOO buy it.

[Chainsaw man]

Invertin is Just so cool lioke this

EDIT: You know, Invertin Reminds me of some one one of my family members are obsessed about, a aparent Prophet...

“I'm not suffering from epilepsy!”

~ Ellen G. White on having visions

[Glabbit]

If you wrote a book, i would SOOO buy it.

If I pre-order it, do I get access to the beta?

[invertin]

I will not ram- I mean now ramble about the 7th prophet of Naga.

The one known as Boom.

Boom was one of the many famous people born of pure awesome like Darth Vader and Jesus, so he had no father.

Boom was brought up in a poor family, his dad was a blacksmith. Blacksmithing in that age was hard since fire hadn't been invented yet, so they just left bits of metal out in the sun until they melted like ice-cream.

Fortunately, Boom had an idea. If hot things melted, then they were turning into something, and everything melted, so everything was trying to turn into the same thing. This thing he named fire.

Of course he was competely wrong, but since his first tests were on wood it made sense to him.

Gunpowder had already been invented by the chinese, which contradicts everything that everyone knows. But it's true. We discovered gunpowder before fire.

Anyway gunpowder was useless except for making things dirty, fortunately, Boom tested his fire theory on everything. Finding only certain things lit on fire, whereas other things just melted or evaporated. So he figured out fire was seperate to liquid, gas and solids.

When he tested his fire on some Gunpowder, he earned his name.

The first explosion was an awesome event. See, awesome is an enigmatic energy. When something has been done before, it isn't as awesome. Explosions are essentially pure awesome energy trying to break through into a physical form. If it's pure awesome energy, and this was the first explosion ever...

The sheer amount of awesome needed something to go into, and Boom was the only person with the capacity for that much awesome. Boom is probably the most awesome human being to have ever lived. His explosive discovery carried on, he invented the rocket, the missile, the grenade, the uber-bomb, the grenade launcher, the rocket launcher. China still invented the firework, and einstein still found the nuke. But Boom invented the explosion.

Boom is awesome. So awesome he lived for another thousand years, eventually becoming a cyborg and a part ninja. He could never be a full blown ninja, since explosions aren't very stealthy. But he was awesome enough to learn ninjistu anyway.

[Chainsaw man]

Are you trying to Write your owen Bible/Koran?
You seem to have quite an Imagionation needed to such thing!
Keep going!

[invertin]

Imagination? Oh no. This is truth.

TRUTH

YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH

[Lotus Wolf]

Im serious, you need to write a book, i would buy it in a heartbeat.

[Lotus Wolf]

i could be called: Philosophy; The History Of Awesomeness!

[Starrz]

Imagination? Oh no. This is truth.

TRUTH

YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH

True dat.

Now ramble. Interesting stuff XD

[Count Roland]

agreed interesting stuff, could really give a psychologist some insight into your being.

[invertin]

If I wrote a book it'd probably be like the Bible of Grengoism. Except not called a Bible.

Grengoism is the worship of Naga, just so you know.

Anyway there were a few things I forgot just to insinuate just how awesome Boom is.

He didn't have a car. He had a Tank, and later on in his life the tank was fitted with a smaller tank on top of the turret.

His three favorite weapons were- Julie the Rocket Launcher
Greg the Grenade launcher with a chainsaw on the back for close range combat.
And a missile launcher almost as tall as him. He called it only two things- His baby and "The BOOMstick"

...

And since no-one noticed, when I said he had no father then said something about his DAD, I meant his mums husband...

>.>

<.<

But that's enough about the awesomeness that is Boom. I will now explain awesome as well as I can.

Awesome is the most mysterious force in the universe, so enigmatic and confusing that the only reason no school teaches you about it is because scientists don't think something that nonsensical could possibly exist.

They are wrong.

Awesome comes from anything that is awesome. Explosions, lasers, Awesome is a random energy. Meaning if you put alot of awesome into a different universe, different things would be awesome. So explosions and lasers are only awesome because the awesome made it so.

Awesome interferes with organic tissue, especially brain tissue, which is why everyone goes- "THAT'S SO FREAKING COOL" When something explodes in a big firey explosion. Why lasers are 10 times better than bullets and why slow-mo make everything that much more exciting. Think about it, what is so cool about a laser? Laser weapons run on batteries, must overheat incredibly quickly, are generally poorly designed, and while bullets are almost invisible, it's impossible to NOT see the direction of laser fire. That, and if you shot a bullet at a lightsaber, the lightsaber would either miss the bullet or slice it in half, either way the Jedi behind it gets smacked in the face. A blaster bolt just bounces off.

So, lasers are impractical compared to bullets, if so, why do we like them so?

It is the awesome. There is probably another dimension where bullets are more awesome than lasers and as a result are used more.

One thing that you must learn about awesome, it is almost always impractical. An explosion, there is a chance the protagonist won't get out in time. Is it any less awesome when he single handedly blows up an entire factory instead of just telling the police and shutting it down?

Another brilliant example. The lightsaber. Lightsabers are a more elegant weapon for a more civilised age, but wait, they have no weight on the blade. And as one fan-film said "You're just as likely to cut off your own arm as someone elses". And since some starwars blades can resist lightsaber slashes, it's obvious that a sword is more useful.

But lightsabers are awesome. so they always win.

There are many kinds of awesome, but breaking them down would take too long, so I'll seperate them into three categories. Good. Evil. Neutral. Good awesome is like Luke or Obi-wan (still going with star wars examples here). Good awesome is significantly less awesome than evil or neutral, but it has a special ability- You will almost always win. Even though Obi-wan dies, he becomes a Force Ghost and helps luke save the day, and so does Yoda. Yoda's very awesome.

Evil awesome is the most powerful fom of awesome because, let's face it the most awesome characters are always the bad ones. Look at it this way, who is cooler, Vader, or Luke?

Exactly.

Evil awesome has one very distinct bad-side. You almost always lose. And when you do, you lose all your awesome. Another star wars example- The Emperor. Oh sure there was apparantly a comic series or something where he'd managed to clone himself incase he lost, but in the end all the clones got destroyed and his force spirit locked away by the dead Jedi. That's hardly a victory. Darth Vader on the otherhand was filled with awesome evil, but turned good at the end, thus turning it all into good energy. And that's why Darth Vaders force ghost got to see his son again.

Now you may think- What about Darth Maul? He died, but he's still awesome!

No. He is not awesome. His memory is awesome. The awesome from his death remained and shall remain for a while longer, but Maul himself can't be awesome if he's gone forever.

Probably the best example of this good/evil awesome balance at work is Gandalf the Grey. He died. Was killed by a giant beast of pure awesome and fire. The beast lost all awesome and ended up turning into a pile of sludge. Meanwhile, Gandalf was revived, TWICE as awesome. Good awesome always prevails!

Which is kind of annoying. If the revival/immortality powers of good awesome, and the awesomeness of evil awesome were combined, you could create a being of ultimate awesome...

...And the result of that experiment is for another time.

If you are curious about neutral awesome, it depends on the person. It's generally in between, where the neutral character doesn't live forever or revive himself, but gets a little spot in between called "living a long time", and meanwhile is more awesome than good and less awesome than evil.